1. In the evening twilight, loud happy music played at a distance so i can just about hear it. gives me such a sense of loneliness; of loss; brings up memories that arent bad in any sense, but just this intangible forlorn feeling.
makes we want to be alone, rather, it leaves me without the strength to face anything, anybody.
2. Fear of being left behind. in a literal sense. guess i would do anything, stoop to any levels, not to be left behind.
3. being ridiculed in public. wow. cant take it.
i have this rather dumb feeling, in other words, i feel very much like an idiot. dont know for what reason. the blues are here to stay i guess. like the economy i get the feeling i need a war, famine, fascism to get out of this.
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