tic toc.. tic toc

i can hear it.. tic toc tic toc..

its being going on for ..forever i guess

like a seconds hand.. moving steadily

tic toc tic toc tic toc

every night i hear it

but i never registered it

like so many other things that become part of the scenery

selective cognisance.. or Reticular Activation System perhaps

anyway.. it still goes on .. tic toc tic toc

like a clock you would think

just like a clock

but.. strange thing is.

i dont have a clock in my home

really have to someday find then what makes this noise.

Cityscape

i have always hoped that i would get to live in many cities.. that i would meet many people, know many people, that i would try many new things. that experiences would make me wise...

all crap :)

anyways, i do still like the feeling of a new city though cant really say i would prefer change from the comfort of a settled life in a comfortable place..

so.. i was recently going thru old stuff, photos, documents and all.. and was reminded of the places i have lived in.. and each place there are a few memories that outshine others.

for instance in Kochi it is memories of my mother, still young with her hair still black. Smiling over me. I remember Kochi as a Small, Rich place.. with the childrens park, and the toy steam boats they sold outside the park. the city of my birth, Kochi is filled with memories of my family, because that was the last time my entire family lived together. I remember my school, even fleeting memories of the kintergarden.

Chennai - Huge, Smelly, Hot and Lost. Chennai should be a place where i am comfortable, but it is not. I completed school and college there, i made my first real friends, lost frieds to tragedy, rode my first bike, felt first attractions.. all here. But the place is still alien to me. unpleasant memories crowd out the pleasant ones

Dubai - Dark, Sexy, dangerous dubai.. smell of freedom.. the first time i was free. my first salary. first of so many things.. Each moment i spent there was amazing, i was happy and free. I worried about a career, about coming back.. but i was happy. most memories of Dubai is under the night sky, perhaps because i worked most of the days there. dint see much of the sun!

Ruwi, Oman - Serious, commercial and Direct.. First serious responsibilities in my life. learnt i could do what i wanted in life. that there were no limits.

Abu Dhabi - Crazy, Loonie and Fun. Among the loons of Abu dhabi i decided to come back to India do an MBA. Dont know why but this phase transformed me.

Pune - Calm, Young and Old both, Suave. the MBA! the less said the better, but two years well spent. friends i made for a lifetime.

Bangalore - Fast, Fun and Intelligent.. The bright little city which crowds so many experiences into so short a time for me. Different people, different places, and the things i did should again give me things to think of for a lifetime. Overall with the MBA experience makes me a different person. I aint the same guy who joined school

Mumbai - Fast Timeless ecstatic, truly a city that never sleeps. my memory of this is mainly of running somewhere or the other with luggage.. and of course some special memories

Madurai - Conservative, Dubious, Pathetic. The worst city or rather a town i have had the misfortune to live in, perhaps the most pathetic time i have had in my life. hated it. Such stupid people with their pseudo morals and conservatism.. idiots

Gurgaon - Insane, dusty and abusive. never lived in a place where the dichotomy of rich and poor is more visible. the middle path that we see everywhere else cant be seen here. You either drive a car, or you are poor enough to be forgotten. Malls and Skyscrapers sitting in dust. and yes the office and 8 hours of it.

hey.. oh hi!

it s again been a while since my last post. not that i forgot u.. blog :) not at all that i was too busy for you.. just that i had nothing to say.

being able to share a long pause.. a silence in the conversation.. isnt that the sign of good friends :P

talking to a blog.. would that be a sign of lunacy? maybe i should get a dog.. or perhaps a cat.

though i never had pictured in my mind what work life would be like, post the MBA, i assumed that it would be busy. That the day would be full of intellectual rigor, performance measured, compared.. data would flow in and out of excel, there would be a team where i started as an equal., these were kind of assumed, never expected.. nor imagined.

:) funny eh..