patience

I think it takes a month for me to get used to a place.. a new city.. office..ppl.. job

and for that time i have days of ultimate low, boredom, excitement, appeal

and suddenly one month is over and tada.. things are different.. that office looks familiar...colleagues become friends. others must be guided by this exact same clock because suddenly the boss s saying lets go for a drink. suddenly random people say hi.. rikshaw guys dont haggle over rates.. i wake up just in time for office.. suddenly there s a shortage of time, more things to do.. work still sucks but there s light down the tunnel, everybody else is cribbing as much as i, and maybe i am having more fun..

anyways last week i was sitting in a place having a drink.. and a friend ordered a peach drink.. it tasted like peach.. and like a girl i knew. it s amazing how memories come back, it s like one sip and bang.. theres a strong memory. it was like i just kissed her again

these days i come back from the office and get to my room.. get some movie or news on tv.. power up d laptop. mix a drink.. then risk checking out what the lady has cooked up for dinner and i usually dont miss on my prediction of it being inedible.. and then much does not change till i fall asleep. maybe a call .. maybe a long chat.. in between it is this trance till some movie gets over.. without me having noticed much of it.. reading bits and pieces of something on the laptop, check out photos etc..

funny thing is i still look forward to coming back here every evening... 9 hrs in d office nd cant wait to get here.. k not here but generally back

i really need to find some new things.. job, friends, a flat-mate

no why not

these day it s bcome a fad i think to get married and change ur profile pics on gmail fb orkt yada yada to cozy paly couple pics.. why do people do this! it is like they cease to become individuals and suddenly become this 'oh we are one' bullshit. we re friends with you right? and we dont really know or care abt the other precious half do we

anyway these days office has become so drab that a cigi break is something to do, a decision i make - and can do without u know.. boss's approval n data availability and ten other unknowns. i wonder if this why people smoke - if it just that it actually gives u something to do. some action. so what if sale didnt happen, so wht if d market went to the dogs.. smoke!

a nice line i heard on TV.. a 'nation of why not'.. i am like that i think. some one asks me 'lets have a cofi',, and i am 'why nt' some one says lets go to amritsar// i m like why not!

why not

yeah why not

D base is Gurgaon

the first weekend after i'v come to Gurgaon that i have actually spend in gurgaon, all i did today and for that matter yesterday was laze arnd reading catch 22, processing pics from my last 2 weekends (which btw were spend shooting those pics in Jaipur, Kasauli, Chandigarh and delhi) and by sitting and reading all the mail i havnt opened since long - yes i'v actually not had decent internet for the last 6-7 mnths. anyways as i was saying i spend a lot of time opening forwards, obviously i forwarded them again to others who would now have something to do on otherwise boring weekends /workdays as the case may be, although some of them ungracious people then told me to stop, one of them even put up a notice on fb calling it spam.. terrible!

ignoring that, there are nice forwards :) there is this one that i found interesting and here it goes..

"If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears
With their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning

... Uphill...

BOTH ways

Yadda, yadda, yadda
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!

But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.

You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my
childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look

it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write
somebody a letter, with a pen!

...Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to
steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you
were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your Bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video
Games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or
screens, it was just one screen forever!

And you could never win. The game just kept getting
harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only m-net and there was no on screen menu and no remote
control!

You had to use a Little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no
Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons
on Saturday morni

ng. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK
for cartoons, you spoiled
little rat-bastards!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove ... Imagine that!

If we wanted Popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids
today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!

Regards,
The over 30 Crowd"

yeah.. nice one no?

it is slightly frightening i am laughing tho i am a long way from 30.. i mean i am a lot younger... y do i find this funny!

i even found a t-shirt in the mall that i found funny.. and it said .. wait i will upload the pic instead..

if u cant read it says.. "I am not your UNCLE, i dont know you, you dont know me, so dont you call me uncle!

...

i must be getting ancient!

chaos..noises in the head

think about the things that bug me.. and suddenly there is nothing else to think.. i m like what happened to all the other things and i cant think of a single other.. everything i do or think about has to do with..yeah.. d bugging things.. claustrophobic!
the world becomes smaller...problems bigger. books, movies, d phone .. distracting.
blog s full of it.. can seem to get away from it.. yeah i live in it, literally.
people die of swine flue or bullshit.. it is all one great chaos.. one noice that really does not make any sense at all. . i even got the spelling of noise wrong .. and stared at it thinking something was wrong. .
okay!.. there are no noises in te head.. no birds singing yet :) just the chaos

choice

choice... where is it? why am i still here.
i need my regular dose of the urban.. people, drinks, lights, music..
i need the energy, motion, change, the lack of time
i want lack of time
the list of things to do.. a pile of things
things to look forward to
so then i choose to do one thing or the other

blog blah blog blah

is time going fast or what! independence day is here and suddenly i m like didnt republic day just go by! where was i around then? gawd. so far i'v always been like let time go slower so i can experience more types when most people around me had exactly opposite views. at work people wanted time to go faster so their annual vacations would come by and they cud return to india... at college people wantd time to go faster so they could get out of the tough regime there.. i never subscribed to that view..
i had hope for better or i kept thinking that those moments were better than what was to come later..
and yeah i did enjoy most of it
till now
now i certainly want time to fly.. it is like this situation sucks and the future picture isn't rosy either. what do you do then? wish time goes fast cause any way it isnt too interesting or worth waiting and noticing?
uncertainty isnt good at all.. not knowing when and what could happen to change life .. and i dont mean life changing out of the world let me hope for nirvana kind of thing.. all i am saying is if you dont know how long you are going to stay in a boring hotel room with questionable bed sheets.. how long you need to pretend you are contributing to work.. how long you report that shit is taking place.. how long do i need to crib and do nothing else about it
if i were to list things i do now that are signs of super boredom
> i buy DVDs of new movies and never get down to watchng them cause it s too much to do
> i walk around the the place aimlessly for hours together
> i drink cola drink cola drink cola
> i am done with all the restaurants arnd here. i am done with flavours of kellogs, i am done with dosa idli vada as food for any time of the day
> i am trying to learn the tamil alphabet
> i eat biscuits.. i hate biscuits!
> i am giving patience a try.. as a general policy



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